AT LAST!

My journey in Biochem is coming to an end (soon!) !
Its been a tough year and im glad things are ending (thankfully) smoothly.

I've learnt many things during my tenure and accquainted many great friends whom gave me support and brought laughter to the lab (or maybe its the other way round? HAHA!) :)

Well, all that Ive said were the nice, good moments!

In fact, everyday, I have difficulty waking up (so Reb) and ask myself the same qns every single time I rushed to work.



Every morning you see people rush to the train station, SQUEEZE their way into the train (and give an irritated look). Hardly you can see people smiling and politely saying 'excuse me' or 'sorry' every morning. Hardly anyone noticed there's actually someone sitting on the floor, begging for money everyday. Everyone just walked quickly, paused a while to collect the free newspaper daily, ignorant of the unfortunate on the floor. If not, there are people (like me) who are guilty of paying no attention to the unfortunate at all. Rushing to work is more important than stopping by and help the unfortunate.

That is why I am always asking myself tt question! "Why am I always in a rush??"

In a blink of eye, a year passed. But do we even have time to notice the small things happening in life and appreciate them? At such times, Im always reminded of this story of a cancer patient ( i cant rmb the title of the show.. but i can rmb this scene vividly..). Throughout his young days, he strived hard and worked very hard. During his last days, sitting on his wheelchair in the hospital garden, he closed his eyes and enjoyed the gentle wind brushing his face. When he opened his eyes, a leaf dropped from the tree nearby and he opened his palms to catch it. Looking at it, he thought ' all my life i have been rushing and rushing. i did not even have the time to appreciate the small things in life. just like now. if i was still healthy, i wouldnt even take a look at this leaf and realise autumn is coming..."

Everytime I rush, everytime i hate myself for not able to wake up earlier and make myself happier. Everytime I rush, I feel a sense of routine, I feel disconnected from this universe.

And that brings me to the decision of leaving my job. I admit i do have difficulty managing my work-life balance. Almost every single time the thought of irregular working hours irks me and I feel trapped. My temper was never good right from the start. But (dunno since when) it became worse. :(

Of course, leaving this position doesnt mean that such things wont happen again. Every end is a new beginning. Hopefully, with a better working hour job, things can get better :)

All in all, I am especially thankful to one person who has been tolerating my nonsense, giving me attention and encouragement all these while. Many times when I felt like giving up, thank you for reasurring me and holding onto me so tightly; sticking through this tough period with me. Thank you, Ling. :)